by Jim Sampsen

1. Make sure that your child knows that you love her and are proud of her efforts at all times. Remind your child that efforts is always rewarded, at least with the satisfaction of trying your best.

2. Try your best to be completely honest about your child's athletic capability, her competitive attitude, her sportsmanship, and her actual skill level.

3. Be helpful - but don't coach her on the way to the gym...or on the way home.

4. Teach her to enjoy the thrill of competition. Don't say "Winning doesn't count" because it does.

5. Try not to relive your athletic life through your child in a way that creates pressure. Don't pressure her because of your pride.

6. Don't compete with the coach. Remember, in many cases, the coach is a hero to his/her athletes, a person who can do no wrong.

7. Don't compare the skill, courage or attitudes of your child with that of other members of the team. Everyone has different timetables for learning.

8. Get to know the coach so you can be sure that his philosophy, attitude, ethics and knowledge are such that you are happy to expose your child to him.

9. Always remember that children tend to exaggerate, both when praised and when criticized. Temper your reactions when they bring home tales of woes or heroics.

10. Make a point to understand courage and the fact that is relative. Some of climb mountains but fear a fight; some of us fight but turn to jelly if a bee buzzes nearby. A child must know: Courage is not absence of fear, but rather doing something in spite of that fear.